Whale Man

Whale Man

What drug is Whale Man on? People don’t blow themselves up in whale floats for no reason. This guy is either smoking crack rocks or he has a very, very, verryyyyyy strange fetish. What about you? When was the last time you put your whale suit on?

Kids in the trunk

Kids in the trunk

DRIVER WITH KIDS IN TRUNK! I’ll be damned. That looks like fun to a ten year old. I bet those kids feel so damn cool, that a hot desert couldn’t faze them in the daylight of July. I was ten once and sat in the trunk of a truck (with a roof) and thought it [...]

Because prison rape is hilarious

Because prison rape is hilarious

I LOLed till my ass fell off Thank you BoonDocks for accentuating on how hilarious prison rape is. Thank you again for spoofing the Scared Stiff/Straight, whatever the heck that show is. I wasn’t ever a fan of the show, but if this is the kind of comedy you provide, then I suppose I’ll start [...]

OMFG OCTOMOM PORN

octomom-porno

OCTOMOM PORN EPIC EWWWWWWWW News articles from real sources say that Octomom, Nadya Suleman, is filming a porno video. We suspect she did this due to her recent filing for bankruptcy. I hope she uses her porn money to take a parenting and money management class, and stop acting like broke-ass ex-NBA player Allen Iverson. [...]

Grandmas watch Kim Kardashian Sex Tape

Grandmas watch Kim Kardashian Sex Tape

The grandmas watch the Kim Kardashian sex tape and record their reaction. They talk about how bad Kim Kardashian is at sex, which I believe, because she sucks at everything. I won’t even watch her sex tape because she just sucks at life so much and I have no interest in seeing her fat ass [...]

Marshmallow People? Wtf?

Marshmallow People

I take no responsibility for this I am sorry for what you’re about to watch. It is painfully internetastic. It will blow your mind. You will not ever think of a marshmallow or an otter the same way. I apologize to the otters of the world. And to the marshmallows, there’s a stick for everyone [...]

Metro bus hits college student

metro bus hit by nick

Metro Bus 1 – Nick 0 Some dude Nick decided to jump in front of a Metro bus during the beginning of a foam sword fight. Nick is not the Hulk, so the bus pretty much pwned him. Dear Nick, you got knocked the f*ck out!  

Dania Londono Suarez – Secret Service Prostitue

Dania Londono Suarez - Secret Service Prostitue

DON’T TRUST A HOOKER! I have several problems with Dania Londono Suarez, the dirty prostitute who spilled beans about banging a secret service agent when she didn’t get paid. 1. You asked for $600 to $800, but you’re only worth about $100. If that includes anal. 2. You’re not really attractive. Colombian women are very [...]

Ashton Kutchers Racist Video

ashton kutcher racist

YOU’RE ALL IDIOTS Once you watch this video and realize that this is part of a dating game spoof video, then you’re going to feel like a complete idiot for thinking this is even remotely racist. You know what was racist? 20-30 black dudes beating up some white chump and saying “That’s for Trayvon!” Oh, [...]

Woman spits and trolls news boy

woman Spits In Front of news camera

This is why you’re 40 and single. You’re that oblivious that you can’t tell what a giant news camera looks like?  And that dweeb with the microphone doesn’t set off any clues? And once you finally realize what it is, you keep spitting on the camera? And I’ve just began three sentences in a row [...]

Tanning Booth Mom

tanning booth mom

TANNING BOOTH MOM Dear Patricia Krentcil, the tanning booth mom from Nutley New Jersey, you are an idiot. You’re not attractive. You’re not natural. You’re not smart. You look like bacon and I think that’s an insult to bacon, because I’d rather do a horizontal dance with a package of burnt bacon then getting next [...]

Hot Links for May 1st, 2012

cute baby pictures

Welcome to May 1st. I’m watching the Flyers and Devils game while updating Crankers.com. I am also topless. Here’s some random hotlinks! Enjoy the visual of me topless.   Nom Nom Monster turns a cute baby into a slimy German thought. Epic Fail video from the bluest site on the web, EHOWA. Final Dark Knight [...]

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