Crankers | The Funny Gamer Hangout
I'd like to thank Mr. Mar Far and The Green Recon for joining me in the top three of this game, racking up a combined score of 30,000 points during a Conquest game on Locker via Xbox One. You can tell I didn't do much of the killing and The Green Recon wasn't even in our squad, but he should have been. The Green Recon and Mr MAR FAR
Game report here:
Our combined Kill Death Ratio was a pretty sick 2.9 with stat line of 116-40.
Winning by 400-500 isn't out an out of the ordinary statistic. There's plenty of conquest Metro and conquest Locker games ending like this. The key is to hold the middle ground and push them back into their own territory. I don't mean push them into their spawn - but give them the last conquest location and don't let them past it.
Spawn trapping is lame and horribly boring. If I ever see your spawn beacon at a location conducive to you spawn killing them, then you and the rotten beacon will eat C4!
ps - I only beat you by 8 points to get first place, but your KD should've gotten you more points.
I saw something astonishing the other night in a Metro Conquest game on Battlefield 4. This enemy dude was laying prone in front of the elevators behind two smoke grenades. Now I am well aware that there's always someone on this corner, but his smoke grenades actually gave away his precise location and pointed out where I should be aiming.
Watch the video and you can see that the enemy did NOT hide his flash. He's popping smoke but he's flashing lights every time he shoots through the smoke. He should've hid the flash somehow because then I wouldn't be able to judge exactly where he is.
I can tell by walking up to the flash that it's low to the ground and he's in prone, so of course I aim lower and I get him. Then I run to the corner under the cover of their own smoke grenades and take out two more enemies.
Their lack of communication and inability to hide the flash got three people fragged!
He didn't even tell his buddies that he was nuked, so they didn't bother turning around to check their 6, and they got blasted too!
This is also a perfect example of how you're always supposed to stay with your squad, because if his squad stuck together, then maybe he could've called out to them that he was blasted and maybe his boys could've gotten me back.
Instead, I got all three of them.
Was chilling in Metro one day when all of a sudden...I got sad. So I recorded this Battlefield 4 clip to show you why I spent the better part of the evening learning how to make friends and the rest of the night standing in the corner wiping tears away with all the dog tags I stole.
I thought these gamers were nice, but they were not. They had a party without me. I ran into a few of my so called friends at the elevators in Metro and they were mean. We used to be pals. We used to dress alike and speak the same language. Now they're all talking giberish and wearing some other uniform. I walked over to the elevator and I think they were having a party! At first I thought my invitation got lost in the mail because there's no way they'd forget to invite me. I'm like the life of the party. I bring the chips and the 320's. But then they tried to act all hard and they pulled out machine guns and wrecked me.
Everyone was invited to the Metro Elevator Party but me and I think those guys turned into enemies.
I shall follow this with the only video on YouTube worse than any of my own, because now it makes me feel better.
It's official: Twitch is rich. Twitch owners are twitching in their sleep at the thought a bank teller handing them a deposit slip because Amazon has agreed to pay them either 970 million or 1.1 billion - I don't know which one is correct because so many sources are reporting that both. And...who cares? Twitch is rich like Dave Chappelle doing a Rick James skit.
So what do you do with that money? I say they buy a mansion with a moat filled with alligators and a zillion acres of grasslands covered in goats that mow the lawn all day every day. Then hoard a ton of cows and make Twitch beef jerky and your own energy drink, because that's exactly what I toss down during a tough streaming session. Then you invest in a retirement fund and profitable company or product, and start a new company that doesn't do anything but hang out and play Xbox One all day. Maybe throw a few bucks to EA and DICE to make sure Battlefield Hardline is the best game ever, complete with kidnappings and surprise make out sessions in a windowless van. Then share it with the family who has been with you all along (homes, pay off debt, start a college fund) and pay for the other family members to move to another country where you don't ever have to see them again. Then buy 343 studios and shut it down so they can finally stop making a sad mockery of Halo. Seriously 343, you found a way to make Halo the most funless multiplayer game ever. Did you really think a jetpack would make us care? No. They were annoying on all but 2 maps and everyone who used them otherwise is a nitwit with a 3 inch willy wonka if ya know what I'm saying.
So shout out to Amazon for acknowledging the awesome gamer crowd. Don't mess it up or we will boycott you like Rosa Park's friends boycotted a bus company for a whole year. I don't care if you give me Amazon prime free for a year.
AMAZON - DO NOT MESS UP TWITCH OR WE WILL END YOU!
Playing on a Metro Conquest on a DICE server, went 27-14 with a score of 7686 and had the MVP spot the entire game and guess what happens? This guy XPAUL88 scores a few extra points at the last second and takes the cake!
Nice work dude!
We had a good squad of shooters with mics and an open slot in our squad. Add me and let's squad up sometime.
I'm CRANKERSdotCOM and you can add these guys as well - both team players with MICS - Glock3nStein and X Prizm X.
We also had an English dude named El Dopio - we can call him Mate or something...if he ever squads up with us again. He kind of ditched us for the other team, even though we were winning for a while.
Hey everyone, we will be playing Diablo III Ultimate Evil on Xbox One tomorrow around 11:30am - we get the game AT 11 and should be set up by 11:30!
Add me on Xbox Live, gamertag, "CRANKERSdotCOM"
Here's game play if you haven't seen it yet!
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