If pants were no longer mandatory in public, would you still wear them? Would you wait to see if others went barelegged, or would you be the initiator in your neighborhood and be the first to walk to your car without pants?
Would you go to work bottomless and fart at will?
Being that you don’t have to wear pants, what particular reasons would justify your lack of pants? Are they uncomfortable, restricting, and not fashionable? And since you’ve chosen to not wear pants any longer, where is the first place you would go? The mall, shopping center, movies, dancehall, significant others to meet the parents?
I never found pants to be that much of a problem. Would I go bare limbed if given the option? At first, I might wear shorts, and then after it sinks in that having my wanker dangle in public is the norm, I’ll then discontinue my coverage.
Top ten places to go pantless
10. Supermarket/mall. Old people and shoppers now have something funny to gawk at.
9. Dentist’s office. Inhaling laughing gas half-naked has to be an experience.
8. Movies. If you’re a teenager, you now have less work to do because your pants are already off.
7. Psychiatrist. If you’ve a small wiener/rack, then the Dr. will assume you’re insecure and not even think to consider your multiple personalities.
6. Family reunion. Drinking all day and having cocknballs-measuring contests usually only happened in West Virginia…until now.
5. Church. You’ll probably score, but you can’t tell anyone.
4. Dance club. Now guys can’t tell the women that the hard thing is a cell phone.
3. Beach. Finally, USA has more of what Europe has.
2. Weight watchers. Chances are you’re overweight and no one wants to see you with your pants off anyway.
1. Meet the parents. Now you can show your girl’s dad what’s been in his precious princess. And for the girls, show your guy’s dad what he’s wanted to see anyway.
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