NO ONE CARES! Wait. I’m wrong. Which doesn’t really ever happen. But I am wrong. PEOPLE DO CARE! You know who cares? Me, because now I know who Minka Kelly is going to date next, because I am her next boyfriend, aka, boy toy. I can tell you this – my bat is bigger then Derek Jeter. No, I didn’t say Derek Jeter’s bat, I said DEREK JETER HIMSELF! You guessed it. I have a life size inflatable bat. Of course, I know you were thinking about my man parts, but that’s because you’re a pervert with a sick mind. Get your mind out of the gutter, and get your mind on thoughts of Minka Kelly naked riding a carousel.
Can you hear the crappy carnival music in your head as she goes around on a horse? I can! Score! This ride even comes with balloons!
By the way, it was told to me by sources of the Internet that their break up was peaceful. I was also then told that NO ONE CARES, but then I realized something else. People care less about anything to do with Kim Kardashian and her pointless life. She’s a fat, talentless, a waste of skin.
BTW – WHO THE F*CK NAMES THEIR KID MINKA?
{ 0 comments… add one now }