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Hurricane Irene is a Shark in the Street (but a freak in the bed, no?)

Hurricane Irene is a Shark in the Street (but a freak in the bed, no?)

Check out this awesome picture of a shark swimming in the streets of Puerto Rico. Hurricane Irene swept the poor little shark into those damn dirty streets, and now we have to rescue the shark! Maybe he can eat some of the homeless people or fat girls to help Puerto Rico with it’s problems. On [...]

Hipsters. You guys look like a bunch of homeless idiots.

Hipsters. You guys look like a bunch of homeless idiots.

Earth to hipsters! Earth to hipsters! Can one of you read this and reply so that I can understand your terrible movement? I just don’t get it. You hipsters pride yourself on terrible clothes, dirty hair, and unkempt facial hair. You enjoy drinking terrible beer. You look like homeless gay guys who failed to pick [...]

Looks like someone on FaceBook loves their dog!

Looks like someone on FaceBook loves their dog!

It’s great to know that all dog owners seriously love their pets. How could you not love this cute little dog in the picture. I’ll tell you how. With a shovel. I would hate this dog too. In fact, the dog grins at you every day because it pooped and peed somewhere in the house, [...]

Hurricane Irene video and faux Guide to Survival

Hurricane Irene video and faux Guide to Survival

Video clip of Hurricane Irene in the Bahamas. It looks windy and rainy, but doesn’t look scary. What’s scary is the thought of fat Rosie O’donnell naked (epic projectile vomit). I heard she ate some Krispy Kreme donuts and got off the couch, which is what caused the earthquake in Virginia this week. Hurricane Irene [...]

Jim Carey video to Emma Stone – who wants to go camping? I DO!

Jim Carey video to Emma Stone – who wants to go camping? I DO!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S9lPEP2mGWw Funny video with Jim Carey professing his love for Emma Stone. His humor reached a new level of outstanding the moment he mentioned camping, Yahtzee!, and sex in the same sentence.  I hope Emma Stone records a funny video response to Jim and states how much she would love him if he were 20 [...]

Fat Carrie Fisher got skinny. I didn’t even know she was fat.

Fat Carrie Fisher got skinny. I didn’t even know she was fat.

Holy crap! Carrie Fisher must have weighed like 250-300lbs. How could cute Princess Leia, with those cute little curly cinnamon buns on her head and hot space madness bikini, get so fat that she actually looks like Jabba the Hut? How many donuts and space worms did she eat on a daily basis? Hey Luke, [...]

I didn’t want to post this, but girls like cute dog videos.

I didn’t want to post this, but girls like cute dog videos.

Hey guys, I’m really sorry I had to post this cute dog video, but I have to please the women sometimes. I know you’re all into the cool funny videos and things that don’t mention the word cute unless its “cute girls” but sometimes you have to give some to take some. And I want [...]

That’s a good stage, I’ma let you finish in a minute

That’s a good stage, I’ma let you finish in a minute

Kanye West falls off stage during a concert while singing one of his songs that I do not know the title to and am too lazy to Google it, even though I just stole this video off another website, which took the same amount of effort it would take to Google the song he’s singing [...]

My awkward days in high school when I had no friends

My awkward days in high school when I had no friends

Imagine being 17, living in the suburbs far away from your city friends, and having no car. Then imagine your parents go to Mexico for the week, leave you with your hearing impaired grandmother, and your friends don’t feel like picking you up because you’re so far out of the way. What do you do? [...]

I want to punch this dog square in the dick

I want to punch this dog square in the dick

First of all, I invented the tickle monster. It’s something I came up with 14 years ago when my one year old sister was just learning to laugh. Second. I want to bang the blond tickling in this dumb dog video. Third. You guessed it. I want to punch that stupid dog right in the [...]

Harry Potter’s new ending and other Movie Nonsense

Harry Potter’s new ending and other Movie Nonsense

Making a more meaningful fake endings to a fake unbelievable movie only makes the movie better. This opens Pandora’s box on how other movies should have ended. I got a whole list of fake movie endings in my head. In fact, I wish I was an animator because then I could create my own awesome [...]

This is how you make a cool freezing bubble

This is how you make a cool freezing bubble

Take your bubbles outside. Blow bubbles. Then put the monkey down. Next, take some actual bubbles outside when it’s cold out. It should probably be cold enough to snow. If not, I suppose you could try this in your freezer like I did. You put the bubble on the bubble wand and let it sit [...]

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