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Give me a ticket, I give you a chainsaw.

Give me a ticket, I give you a chainsaw.

I’ll take the parking ticket, and raise you a chainsaw. While you’re at it, put in a new parking meter, because I just sawed yours down.

Vatican says what we already knew – WHITE PEOPLE CHURCH IS BORING!

Vatican says what we already knew – WHITE PEOPLE CHURCH IS BORING!

White people church is more boring then watching Rosie Odonnell pick boogers from her belly button.

21 Jump Street – from cool show to funny movie.

21 Jump Street – from cool show to funny movie.

Redband trailer for 21 Jump Street with Jonah Hill and Channing Tatum.

The Rum Diary – worth seeing it or no?

The Rum Diary – worth seeing it or no?

Oh how we love to drink rum by the gallons, we shave our chest in the shower and play power hour, we drink rum by the gallons!

How to quit your job like a boss

How to quit your job like a boss

Dear Job, I no longer like you. You treat me like a battered wife. I am not some girl in a Lifetime movie – I WILL ACTUALLY LEAVE YOU! So here I am, with my own terrible marching band, to inform you that I quit my job as soon as the drum roll kicks in. And….a 1, a 2, and a 3 – drum roll please!

Hi. That’s a dirtbike and you should move.

Hi. That’s a dirtbike and you should move.

Sometimes you just have to stand there and take it like a girl. A big, dumb, idiot, brainless, girl. I’m sorry, did that offend the smart girls out there? My bad – it’s just that the girl in the dirt bike video is probably the biggest moron I’ve seen all month, and that’s a full 20 days up to this point. 20 days of dumb girl wrapped up into one short funny clip video.

Boy reacts to the Empire Strikes Back

Boy reacts to the Empire Strikes Back

Quiet little buddy has quite the reaction to Darth Vader in the Empire Strikes Back. I wonder what his reaction will be when he finds out Santa Claus is real too! I bet you’re reacting funny right now from reading that and finding out your parents lied about a lie when you were 12! He’s real. I’ve met him in front of a JC Penny at the mall.

Dave Chappelle’s Samuel L Jackson Beer Parody

Dave Chappelle’s Samuel L Jackson Beer Parody

Seriously Dave Chappelle – stop hiding and get your black ass back on stage. You’re not funny when you’re hiding from the world. Stop being an irrelevant nobody and revive your career in only the way that you can. Can anyone name a comedian who is as funny now as Dave Chappelle used to be? [...]

More Proof that No One Likes Tila Tequila

More Proof that No One Likes Tila Tequila

When you’re name is Tila Tequila and the only gig you get is at a creepy Insane Clown Posse Juggalo show, then you know you’re a loser. Tila Tequila must be desperate for money if she’s accepting a job like this because the people who want to see ICP do not, and will not, enjoy [...]

Obama Heckler Tossed, Ugly Jacket Joke Ensues

Obama Heckler Tossed, Ugly Jacket Joke Ensues

Let’s talk about President Obama, the heckler, and the awful attempt at comedic relief. I’ll use a checklist so it’s streamlined and seems official, kinda like that time you thought you accomplished something important at work when the boss asked if anyone had any suggestions on how to improve the conditions of the company, and [...]

Girl I’m not your Puppet – a video to all the ladies out there!

Girl I’m not your Puppet – a video to all the ladies out there!

I was just about to go to bed on my nicecozy pillows and feathery blanket, next to my girlfriend a cat who cries when the lights go out because I think it’s scared of the dark. Then I saw this funny puppet video titled “Puppet Break Up” and had to watch it three times. This [...]

Jersey Shore + Scary Snowman Prank = Epic Fail!

Jersey Shore + Scary Snowman Prank = Epic Fail!

If you want to get punched in the face, then dress up as a snowman, hang out on the WildWood Boardwalk, and wait for some heavy metal Dad to bring his suckerfaced kid up to your snowman costume, then scare them, then brace your face for the impact of a roundhouse punch. First – what [...]

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